Hummus
What you will need:
four cloves of garlic
two tablespoons of cold water
three tablespoons of tahini (you can buy this stuff in jars - stir it before spooning out) - don't worry about being too exact with it - just slop out about three tbsps - a bit extra will make it a bit smoother anyway.
4, maybe 4 and a half tablespoons of lemon juice (bout 1 and a half lemons). You might find you want to put less if you buy lemon juice, as it's much more acid than lemons.
half a teaspoon of salt
paprika
olive oil
some chickpeas - a tin will do - if you get dried chickpeas - here's what ya do:
Get a cup from a set of cups and saucers, fill it with dried chickpeas, get a pan and put the chickpeas and lots of water in the pan. Leave it overnight or until the next night. Put the pan onto boil. When it boils, turn the heat right down, put the lid on if the pan's got one and leave it to simmer for about an hour. If it hasn't got a lid, just make sure it doesn't run out of water.
Get all ingredients except olive oil and paprika and shove it in a blender or a food processor and press the go button. If you don't have a blender or owt like that, get a good solid \m/ metal \m/ potato masher with the smallest holes you can and mash the chickpeas. Give the chickpeas a bit longer to cook too, they'll start to fall apart a bit by then. Chop the garlic as finely as you can and add that.
When it's done, shove it in an old margarine tub - it should just fit. If it doesn't you may have to just eat all the extra stuff. You can also add a bit of paprika and olive oil at this point if you like. Don't use cheap olive oil.