Babe, I'm leaving, I'll be on my way, but before i go, there's some things i gotta say
i .......... said i was a rover, a real, cassanova
soon as i've had my leg-over, i head off down the boozer
cos i'm a bastard, i'm a bastard
i'm always on the road trying to loosen my load, i'm a bastard
i'm a bit of a lad, i'm a real scallywagi'm a bastard, i'm a bastard
i hump 'em, and i dump 'em, i ride 'em, then step aside
as soon as i've shot my load, i head for the road
i fuck 'em, and i chuck 'em, i use 'em, then i lose 'em
wham bam thank you mam, i'm off to the pub i am
wham bam thank you mam, wham bam thank you mam. I'm a bastard
he's a bastard, he's a bastard, he's a real toe rag, he's a dirty slag, he's a bastard
he's a real scumbag, not even a good shag, he's a bastard, he's a bastard
wait on !!! wait on !!! What y'on wi'you ???
i'm easy like a sunday morning me .......... i'm t'wanderer
wherever i lay me 'at .... an' all that
cos that's me innit !!! it's what i'm like !!!
i, just been to the clinic joe, and there's a few things, that you ought to know
i've got chlamydia, herpes, crabs as well and .. i've fucked all your friends
even fat frank, and dirty dan oh, and just one last thing, i was ..... once a man
you bastard !!!..... fucking hell,you're like summat off o' jerry springer
you're a right minger, you're a bastard !!!